Chapter 4: Already at the Gate
I sat with that photograph for a long time without speaking.
Carol didn't try to fill the silence.
She just sat there with her hands folded, letting me take it at whatever speed I needed.
Jaylen had moved to the floor in front of the television.
He wasn't watching it.
He was watching me.
"Go play in the back room," I told him.
"Take the dinosaurs."
He picked up his backpack and went without arguing.
That scared me more than anything else.
He only went without arguing when he knew something was wrong and didn't want to make it worse.
I looked at Carol.
"How long have you known?"
"About the other woman?
About a year." She pressed her lips together.
"About what kind of man Marcus is?
Most of his life."
"And you're telling me now."
"I tried to tell you before.
I called you twice last spring.
You didn't know who I was and you hung up."
I remembered two calls.
Unknown number.
I had assumed spam.
"I should have left a message," she said.
"I didn't know what to say."
"You could have said exactly what you just said."
"Yes." She didn't make excuses.
"I could have."
Mia was awake now, making small sounds that would turn into bigger ones soon.
I unclipped the carrier straps and lifted her out.
She grabbed my collar and pulled herself up against my shoulder and went quiet.
"He's on a plane right now," I said.
"Most likely."
"To see her."
"That would be my guess."
I picked up my phone.
Marcus's last text was still on the screen.
*Already at the gate.
Where are you?* I read it again.
The casual cruelty of it.
He had known exactly where I was.
He had known Aunt Diane wouldn't stay.
He had known I wouldn't make that flight.
"He planned this," I said.
Carol nodded slowly.
"I think he needed you occupied."
"Occupied." I repeated the word like it was in a foreign language.
"He couldn't have you showing up in Miami.
So he put you somewhere you'd be stuck."
My hands were shaking.
I pressed Mia closer so she wouldn't feel it.
"He used my kids," I said.
"He used them to keep me here."
"Yes."
"He didn't forget to arrange childcare.
He arranged it to fail."
Carol didn't answer.
She didn't need to.
I stood up.
I wasn't sure why.
My body just needed to not be sitting down anymore.
I walked to the window and looked out at the street — Aunt Diane's quiet neighborhood, the same oak tree, the same parked cars, everything exactly the same as it had been an hour ago when my life was a different shape.
"I need to know everything," I said.
"Her name.
Where she lives.
How long."
"Her name is Tamara.
She's in Coral Gables.
Marcus has been with her for three years."
Three years.
We had been together for two.
I turned around.
"He started with her first," I said.
"Yes."
"So I'm the other woman."
Carol's face did something complicated.
"You didn't know.
That matters."
"It doesn't feel like it matters right now."
"I know." She stood up.
"But it will."
She crossed the room and stopped in front of me.
Up close she looked tired in a way that went deeper than one long drive.
She looked tired the way people look when they have been carrying something heavy for years and have finally decided to put it down.
"I'm sorry," she said.
"For all of it.
For him.
For not finding a way to reach you sooner."
"Why are you doing this?" I said.
"He's your son."
She looked at me steadily.
"You have an eight-month-old and a six-year-old," she said.
"And he left you sitting in an empty house with no childcare and no warning, so he could fly to another woman." She paused.
"He's my son.
But I know what he is."
Mia grabbed a fistful of my hair and held on.
My phone buzzed on the couch cushion.
May you like
We both looked at it.
The screen said: *Marcus.*
