Chapter 9: My Sister's Birthday
We rescheduled the birthday dinner by three weeks.
Jess had said it didn't matter, that we could do it whenever, that she didn't need a fuss.
But Tyler had been the one to insist — he'd called her himself and told her to pick the restaurant, that he was paying, that she didn't get a vote on the paying part.
She picked a small Italian place she'd been going to since before I knew her address by heart.
Round tables, candles in wine bottles, a waiter who called her by name when we walked in.
The three of us sat by the window.
Tyler ordered a bottle of wine and poured Jess's glass first.
"I owe you a toast," he said.
"You don't owe me anything."
"Jess."
She looked at him.
"You saved me from going to that appointment alone," he said.
"And you saved me from whatever came after it.
I don't know exactly what that would have looked like, but I know it would have been worse." He held up his glass.
"So.
Thank you.
For being the kind of person who stays up until one in the morning making folders for people she loves."
Jess's chin moved.
Just slightly.
"You would have figured it out," she said.
"Maybe.
Eventually." He shook his head.
"But you made it faster and less alone.
That matters."
She picked up her glass.
We drank.
The food came and we ate and talked about other things — her job, a trip she was thinking about taking, a book she'd read twice because she couldn't stop thinking about it.
The restaurant filled up around us and the candles burned down and nobody looked at their phone.
At some point Jess said, "I'm sorry I didn't tell you right away.
Either of you.
When Carol first called."
"You've apologized for that already," I said.
"I know.
I just keep thinking about what would have happened if I'd waited longer."
"But you didn't."
"I almost did.
I almost talked myself out of it twice." She turned her wine glass slowly.
"I kept thinking — what if I'm wrong?
What if I make everyone scared for nothing?
What if I ruin your trust in Tyler over something that turns out to be completely innocent?"
"You were protecting me," I said.
"Even then."
"I was scared of getting it wrong."
"That's the same thing."
She looked at me.
"You've always done that," I said.
"Even when we were kids.
You'd think about something for days before you said it, because you didn't want to cause damage if you weren't sure.
That's not a flaw, Jess.
That's just who you are."
She was quiet for a moment.
Then she said: "I'm really glad he's okay."
"Me too," I said.
Tyler reached across the table and squeezed her hand once.
She let him.
We stayed until the restaurant was nearly empty and the waiter started setting chairs on tables at the edges of the room.
Jess ordered dessert and ate most of it and let Tyler pay without arguing, which I noted and appreciated.
Walking out, she linked her arm through mine the way she used to when we were teenagers walking home from somewhere.
"Same time next year?" she said.
"Same time next year," I said.
"Except next time you actually get to pick the date."
She laughed.
May you like
The rain from earlier had cleared.
The street was wet and bright under the streetlights, and the three of us walked to the car together, and nobody had anything left to be afraid of tonight.
