Chapter 7: The Thing Brenda Said Before They Took Her
They charged Brenda Cole at 4:47 in the afternoon.
I was in the family liaison room with Lily when it happened.
Lily had fallen asleep across two chairs pushed together, her head on my folded jacket, her breathing finally slow and even.
I was watching her sleep when Detective Voss appeared in the doorway and gestured for me to step out.
"Facilitating the exploitation of a minor," Voss said quietly in the hallway.
"Three counts.
More charges are likely pending the full review of the memory card and the financial records." She paused.
"Her lawyer is already working on bail."
"She'll get out?"
"Possibly.
That's not something I can control." Voss looked at me carefully.
"But her husband — Gerald Cole — came to the station voluntarily about an hour ago.
He claims he had no knowledge of any of this.
He was visibly shaken.
Whether that's genuine, we'll determine." She paused.
"He did provide one thing voluntarily.
A name."
I waited.
"The man in the sedan.
Gerald Cole says he met him once, at a charity function two years ago.
Says Brenda introduced them.
Says the man donated heavily to a children's literacy foundation that Brenda helped organize." Voss's voice stayed completely flat.
"His name is Martin Hale.
He's a commercial property developer.
Offices in three states.
His name appears on the donor wall of two elementary schools in this district."
The hallway felt very cold.
"He put his name on schools," I said.
"Yes."
I looked back through the small window in the door at Lily sleeping.
Her chest rising and falling.
Her face finally, temporarily, at peace.
"Did you find him?"
"We executed a search warrant on his primary residence at three this afternoon.
He was not present.
His passport is missing.
We have alerts at all major airports and border crossings." Voss paused.
"We will find him."
I believed her.
I needed to believe her.
"Can I see Brenda?" I asked.
I didn't know why I asked it.
The words came out before I could stop them.
Voss studied me.
"Why?"
"Because I want to understand how a woman does this.
I want to look at her and understand it."
"You won't," Voss said simply.
"But if it matters to you — she asked to speak with you.
Before they processed her.
Her lawyer advised against it.
She asked anyway."
My hand went flat against the wall.
"What did she say?"
Voss reached into her jacket pocket and produced a folded piece of paper.
"She wrote it down.
She asked that it be given to you.
I've read it.
It's not a confession.
It contains nothing legally useful." She held it out.
"You don't have to take it."
I took it.
I unfolded it in the hallway, under the fluorescent light.
Brenda's handwriting was neat and even, the letters perfectly formed, the way you'd expect from a woman who sent home printed schedules.
It said: *I told myself they were never in any real danger.
I told myself that every single time.
I need you to know that I know that doesn't matter.*
That was all.
I folded it back up.
May you like
I put it in my pocket.
I went back into the room where Lily was sleeping and sat down beside her and put my hand lightly on her back so she would feel, even in sleep, that someone was there.
